After several rousing sessions of Krav Maga and a Xena: Warrior Princess binge, the power hungry, well connected, and influential personal assistant of the VP of PR, Effervesce, demanded that we remind readers of a very simple, but powerfully effective axiom:
ACT, don’t REACT.
Given this started the run up to the highly anticipated blockbuster movie (and best hero ever, ever) Wonder Woman, we felt the topic appropriate.
BELIEVE that you can be ready for anything and act with confidence. The short of it is that you can do this by knowing, cultivating, and using your strengths. The long of it is actually taking the time to know, cultivate, and use your strengths.
You can approach life in two ways – action or reaction. When you act, you come from a place of deliberation, control, personal power, and strength. When you react, you’re giving your power and energy away –to others, or worse, to nothing except ego and anger. It’s how you deal with things that define you. If you haven’t been ‘great,’ at dealing with people or things IN THE PAST, it doesn’t mean you can’t start. Start from where you are and consciously act – participate in making yourself the person you want to be, not tumbling through life reacting to every bump.
There will ALWAYS be external situations and people that annoy/anger/frustrates us. ALWAYS. Get used to this cute, exciting, and stalwart little aspect of life – WORK WITH WHAT IS. Don’t get stuck in arguing ‘should’s,’ or worse, blaming – either a higher power, other people, or circumstances. It wastes everyone’s time, catapults you into victim-hood, and negates your personal power. If it shouldn’t be, then it wouldn’t be. DEAL WITH IT. Stand up, put your big boy/girl pants on, beat your chest and stare down your critics. Attitude going into anything is EVERYTHING. Start as you mean to go – in control of you and your thoughts.
Fortunately or unfortunately, you’re going to have to use time, practice and patience to reset the default, negative, self-sabotaging and reactive behaviours. Whether you know it or not, you’ve practiced yourself into negativity – a lot. And whether you accept it or not, you, and only you have the power to change it.
Just because your vision is red, and your belly blazes with the fire of a thousand suns in response to someone or something, remember that you don’t have to (re)act immediately. Unlike our over-reactive, greedy, and over-bearing plastic CEO, we can have this urgent memo from our egos to act or respond irrationally, and not actually act upon it. You can pause. No, really, you can. Just work on this first – the NON reaction and/or pause. Sometimes we can gather ourselves in a few seconds, and other times we need to remove ourselves, hopefully politely, from the situation to talk our inner (She)Hulk down before we respond. And this is OK.
The only control you have in any given situation is over YOU and YOUR THOUGHTS. No one can get a rise, annoy, frustrate, or anger you without YOUR PERMISSION. If you find this happens a lot or repeats in your interactions and relationships with people, it’s because people are entertained by the response or rise they can get from you. Give them a boring show for a change; act, don’t react. Focus on something GOOD. Then find someone who doesn’t want to push your buttons for their own amusement when they need a little pick me up.
Your life literally depends on the path you choose and the decisions you make. Life is full of challenges, and people face problems their entire life. Life becomes peaceful and satisfying when you know how to handle the inevitable pothole or challenge with positive and productive action. Act, don’t react!
Pause if necessary
Solution focused (not focused on the problem!)
Be assertive (not aggressive or reactionary)
Experience your love, peace, joy, and success in life