The Green Scene
The other day, after a nice soothing lunch of several high-ball cocktails and stewing resentment, the ostensibly disgruntled Security Manager here at CC commenced an apparent identity crisis, culminating in shouts of, “Take this job and shove it,” before storming out of the building. The second person this month. Rather than address the obviously tense, mind, body, and soul destroying, corporate atmosphere here at the London CC office, HR got us to thinking about a possible feature instead…
How DO you know who you are, and after that, accept who you are? How to avoid a public meltdown of epic proportion? How do people do it?
Before you can accept who you are, you have to know who you are. You can’t accept, and successfully work with, something you don’t know as well as you could. As redundant and trite as it sounds, everyone IS different, and it’s evolved that way for a reason, or it wouldn’t be. Recognize your uniqueness, know it, revel in it, know it, RESPECT IT, hone it, and then play your hand – Find your ace up the sleeve and use it when you need it. KNOW YOUR HAND – Know yourself.
Then, after getting a little acquainted with you, learn to accept and like yourself. If you’re embarrassed by yourself or your desires (that aren’t somehow illegal or perverted), that’s tough and too bad. Tough because THIS is who you really answer to, eventually, one way or another. The only thing that’s embarrassing about you is defined by you because you believed something, ONE BIASED OPINION, along the way. Humiliation and self loathing are only some of the presents that come from denying who you truly are.
Everything starts and ends with you. Not selfishly, of course, but in an airplane-going-down-strap-your-oxygen-on-first, sort of way. If you’re doing everything – your agenda – just for everyone else and their approval, you’re going to be left holding a bag that’s not yours, having no idea what to do with it. You can’t truly help ANYONE, let alone yourself, until you know you and what YOUR needs are in order for them to be met – by you and/or others. And remember that needs are not the same as VALUES. NEEDS should be non-negotiable – it’s basic survival and living 101, not pie in the sky, McMansion entitlement. Values are compromised everyday to get our needs met – like, working as human Kleenex/personal assistant for Cruella DeVille, so you can eat.
And, do have compassion for and BE there for yourself, as you would a beloved friend: Reassure and support the positive mind; quiet and smother the negative mind. Try not fighting it and see what happens.
Part two will offer some first date questions, activities, and how to’s for you and yourself to really get to know each other! Or, suggestions on how to get to know yourself.
But first, the countdown starts… to Cinco de Mayo! Next week’s issue.